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Classics: How to Self-Promote without Sounding Arrogant: Show Notes & Transcript

Post | Jul 21, 2025

Welcome back to Strategic Counsel by ForthRight Business! Looking for Marketing Smarts? You’re in the right place. After almost 4 years of helping to make you savvier marketers, we decided to broaden this podcast to include more business-oriented topics that will make you savvier business leaders.

In this Classics episode, we’re talking how to self-promote without sounding arrogant. Listen to the episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and your other favorite podcast spots – follow and leave a 5-star review!

  • Episode Summary & Player
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  • Transcript

Strategic Counsel: Classics: How to Self-Promote without Sounding Arrogant

Let’s face it – you deserve a pat on the back. Many pats. But giving yourself credit and praise is often awkward and uncomfortable. How do you self-promote without putting people off? We’re here to help you shout your wins from the rooftops! In this episode, you’ll learn how to flatter others as you promote yourself, emphasize the effort behind the accomplishments, and volunteer to teach others an area you excel at. Hear how to nail that performance review, be proud of your accomplishments, and take the credit you deserve. This episode covers everything from flattery to teaching others. Here’s a small sample of what you will hear in this episode:

  • How do you self-promote without sounding arrogant?
  • What should you do if someone else takes credit for your work?
  • How do you give yourself credit?
  • Who deserves the credit in a sales team?
  • How do I not sound boastful?

And as always, if you need Strategic Counsel, don’t hesitate to reach out to us at: ForthRight-People.com.

Check out the episode, show notes, and transcript below:

Show Notes

What is Strategic Counsel?

Welcome back to Strategic Counsel by ForthRight Business! Looking for Marketing Smarts? You’re in the right place. After almost 4 years of helping to make you savvier marketers, we decided to broaden this podcast to include more business-oriented topics that will make you savvier business leaders.

Thanks for listening Strategic Counsel. Get in touch here to become more strategic.

Transcript

Please note: this transcript is not 100% accurate.

00:01
Welcome to the Strategic Counsel by Forthright Business podcast. If you’re looking for honest, direct and unconventional conversations on how to successfully lead and operate in business, you are in the right place. In our discussions, we push on the status quo and traditional modes of thinking to reveal a fresh perspective. This unlocks opportunity for you, your team and your business. Now let’s get to it. Welcome to the Strategic Counsel podcast.

00:31
I’m Anne Candido. And I am April Martini. And as we often like to do, we’re bringing back a previous Classics episode on a topic that we find to help everyone be more successful in business, and that is how to self promote without sounding arrogant. Now, you know us to say that no one’s going to manage your career for you, and part of that is learning to self promote. However, it must be in a way that is heard and appreciated by the receiver or receivers.

00:58
Meaning it should not come across as boastful, egotistical, or overly self-serving. Which begs the question, what is the right way to self-promote? In this episode, we will discuss the approaches, behaviors, communication strategies, all of these good things for doing this effectively. Even for those of you that cringe at the idea of self-promotion. And so with that, let’s get to it. The first one is contextualize your contribution on how you help and can help. Yep. Great. So.

01:28
If someone’s saying something like, I heard your project is going really well, take this opportunity to actually plug how you have helped a team succeed. When you put it in the context of helping, it feels a little bit more selfless and it doesn’t sound arrogant. So let me say it as an example. So if someone says, I heard your project is going really well, you may respond with something like, oh yes, I’ve been doing work to uncover insights, which is helping us really better understand our customer.

01:56
And these inserts are helping our sales team do some fantastic work in fine tuning our sales pitches. So what the listener just heard is interesting. Maybe I could use some similar work on my project to uncover insights. This insights thing could be something that we could all use. He or she didn’t just hear, oh geez, is so full of herself, always bragging about how she’s so good, right? So think about that context and be honest with yourself with regards to how that sounded. And I think most of us would say, you know, yeah.

02:24
I think if somebody said that to me, I would actually appreciate that. And the reason why is because, and this is the clincher, is you would say then after all that, I would be more than happy to set up some time with you to take you through it in more detail. Now, that’s doing two things for you. One, it’s establishing yourself as an expert resource, and you’re helping build capability within your organization and your business. So here’s the mindset shift, you guys. If you aren’t being overt on how you can help,

02:51
you’re actually really doing a big disservice to your organization and your business. So it doesn’t do any good to keep that all inside and to keep all of your expertise inside. Part of building your career and building your reputation is about sharing that information, that expertise that you have. Yeah. I mean, and I think, you know, to the point made before about how this can be difficult and so people can shy away, I think within this point is that it is more of an art form.

03:18
It’s a softer skill and it really takes time to finesse. So the way we look at this is, yeah, it may feel awkward. at first, you know, as you’re working through this mindset shift, it really can feel kind of opposite of the way you’re used to communicating, right? But once you work through that awkwardness, it really does become just an essential tool and such a good way to take ego out of the conversation. We all like to feel helpful, right?

03:45
And I think that that is where a good place to play for that very reason, right? We wanna feel needed, we wanna feel like we can help. However, I also wanna make the contrary point that this is not the idea of like pulling a fast one or acting inauthentically, right? That’s the wrong mentality to take with this. This used to be really hard, honestly, for me to get over because I felt exactly that, like I was trying to pull a fast one, right? And it just felt inauthentic and it felt a little bit icky.

04:10
But once I learned to really lean into the point of this and really think about it through the lens of helping making things better meant, know, the betterment for me and the team, it became a lot more authentic place to play. And now I’m at a point where I really feel authentic joy in the ability to help.

04:27
Yeah, and I think you would say too, as a tone of voice expert, it’s all in the tone. Oh, yeah, absolutely. So in saying like, hey, I want to help sounds appreciative versus like, yeah, I know it all. I know I’m good. Yeah, of course I did. Right. It’s a lot of it in the tone and the tone and the choice of words. But you’re right. It takes some practice and it may feel awkward at first. And so you have to get the tone to feel the most authentic to you. But it can be learned and it can.

04:55
actually have a really good impact. So be careful, you know, don’t shy away from it either because when you start kind of sounding unsure, like it’s like, thank you, you know, everything starts sounding like a question when you say it, you’re losing your impact and that starts sounding inauthentic. So I know we’re putting a lot of like very fine points on things and you guys are hopefully aren’t going to be like, it just sounds too complicated. I don’t even know where to start. I don’t even to try. The thing is to try it and just kind of see what the reactions are and then keep on engaging.

05:25
based on that, right? Yeah, it’s like try and tweak. Yes, exactly. All right, so the second point of how to self promote without sounding arrogant is to flatter others as you promote yourself. April, I’m gonna let you take this one. Yeah, so if you recall the example in the previous point, said, helping our sales team do fantastic work, right? So this is the point of when you lift others up, it doesn’t sound conceited to lift yourself up as part of that team in the process.

05:55
And ultimately it elevates the impact of your work. This is where we’re talking about that aptitude that we mentioned in the intro, right? That you understand how your work impacts the organization and the business and that you’re in tune enough to know what the organization and business needs to be successful. So it really lets you live in a more strategic place. And this is also a way to promote your team as you promote yourself. Really specifically what we mean by this is that

06:22
Many people will sacrifice their contribution for the sake of the team to share credit and then avoid that arrogance that we talked about before. So again, to Anne’s point, we’re not trying to make this hard for you, but what we are trying to do is make sure that you’re seeing how you really have to play in the nuances here, right? This is really especially true of managers. So for example, the conversation that happens a lot is, I heard you got the money for your new product, congratulations. And then the response is, oh, thank you, but really I didn’t do much, it was my team, right? And that’s sort of deflecting.

06:51
And so what the listener just heard as a result of you saying it that way is, oh, I guess he or she is not a significant contributor. that again, a little bit dead in the water there, folks. So instead try saying something like, oh yeah, thank you. It took some deep research to really get to the consumer insight that we were after, which, you know, if you’re playing it right, incidentally, it’s hopefully your role in the project to discover that insight.

07:14
And then I can’t say enough good things about the team. They were super critical and making sure it was a viable opportunity. So here the listener just heard this person knows their value and what they are doing. And they’re a really strong team player, right? You get credit for both without that arrogance. So the watch out here though, or that again, I’m going to, feel like I’m going to be the authenticity police throughout this entire episode. Right. And to your point, it’s because of that tone of voice, you know, expertise and how I live through that. But so you have to be authentic.

07:44
please don’t overdo it. think people’s tendency is then to follow up with their accolades and then with the accolades of others really quickly, which makes you sound like usually you start talking really fast and you sound uncomfortable and unappreciative of the accolades. And then you rush it, right? And then you rush it and it just becomes a mess, right? Or worse, they use that self-deprecating behavior like, oh, you know, I’ve never been good at this sort of thing or these people are much smarter than me on this team. There’s no reason.

08:10
for that to happen, right? You can say, oh, can you explain more? There’s lots of smart people on my team, right? It’s kind of, again, like, it’s tricky because you have to be ready to respond in kind to whatever the other person says. I believe that if you can kind of take a moment, take a breather, think through, don’t get ahead of yourself, right? The mindset shift becomes you can promote yourself and the team, but you don’t have to sacrifice yourself in the process of doing that.

08:37
And I think, you know, I’ll speak really personally here. Sometimes it’s okay to just say thank you and take the compliment. Like if you don’t feel like you’re at the point here, if you need a first step, I will say, it’s to say thank you and then kind of leave it. And I have a very, very hard time doing that because I have a very hard time taking compliments in general. get embarrassed, I get uncomfortable, I don’t need it, I don’t want it. And when I see it coming, I can feel myself kind of clenching up.

09:06
So at the very least, just say thank you. Sometimes the quietness of that is enough for you to feel appreciated in them to see that you accept. So I’ll just say, good first step. I think that is totally right. It’s amazing to watch too. What happens when somebody actually receives a compliment? Part of it, it’s always like a flip flop thing too. It’s like some people complain that they don’t get enough compliments and accolades. And then when they get them, they’re like,

09:36
But no, I don’t want to be the center of attention. No, but no. It makes me so uncomfortable. And then what you want to do is you want to basically nullify it by saying things like, oh, it wasn’t that big of a deal, or it’s not a big thing, or anybody can do it. It’s like, don’t do that. Because it does take away the power of the actual accolade that you got. But then it also, what it does is makes the other person feel uncomfortable. Yeah.

10:02
And nothing’s worse than a self-deprecating manager. I am sorry. It is a very bad tree. There were several folks that I had to engage with in that manner. And that is like the biggest route to making people feel uncomfortable. So there’s another uncomfortable element of that. And it’s just because people don’t know what to do with it. It’s like, obviously you’re a manager. You got there for a reason. like, yeah, for you to say, oh, I’m just a, you know, not a very smart person. Or, you know, it’s just something that, you know, I’m…

10:31
I am very comfortable with or whatever. like it makes people kind of off their game, right? So it’s okay if you don’t know it, like April said, then ask somebody to explain it more, you know? But you don’t have to play like I’m the poor dumb person, you know, in order to make people feel like you’re part of one of them. I’m like, I even understand what the point of that is. Okay. So off soapbox a little bit, but yes, you should definitely flatter others as you promote yourself if you have that discomfort with actually accepting.

11:00
that’s the don’t shortchange yourself in the process. All right, so the third point of how to self promote without sounding arrogant is to emphasize the effort behind the accomplishments. All right, so not only do you have to accept accomplishments, right, which we’ve already said a lot of us have trouble doing, you have to actually really then emphasize that it actually took effort. Like I just said before, we have a tendency to undermine our accomplishments, like

11:28
with the phrases like I said, like, it was nothing. It was super easy. Didn’t take me any time at all. It’s just part of my job, right? You hear that all the time, right? Just the job, right? Even this is true, why would you say it? I don’t understand. I know a culture of a natural tendency to be humble and to kind of deflect a little bit of the discomfort we’re feeling as a result of the accolade. And we always talk about Midwest nice here, right? Oh yeah, Midwest So that’s that humbleness and that mindset that I think we just share in this part of the country.

11:58
We over-index on it. Yeah, we definitely over-index on it. There’s no doubt about that. But if this is really, if humbleness and humility is really a characteristic you have, really take a look at how it’s impacting your personal brand because this might be in this situation a characteristic that’s not helping you move yourself towards your goals. Yeah. Right? So make sure instead people actually appreciate the level effort it took to deliver because this is so important. And even if it’s in fact easy for you,

12:26
Like we mentioned in the early example, we said, you know, we had to go really deep or it took a lot of facilitation when we got there, or we had to work through a lot of challenges or this was a particularly complex strategy. All those ways can be a way of really emphasizing the amount of effort it took. Again, even if it was easy for you, right? Even if it was easy for you to do the caliber or the intelligence you have in doing the work doesn’t undermine the effort it actually took.

12:55
Well, and I think too, you have to learn to own that if it’s easy for you, it probably means you’re really good at it, but not everybody is. That’s a lot of times what I think the miss is. It’s like, just because it’s easy for you doesn’t mean it’s easy for everyone to stop acting like it is because, well, I could get into the whole reason why people might be offended by that, quite frankly. Well, yeah. Yeah, I mean, absolutely. And I call these like the humble high performers, right? Because these people need to be especially careful because you’re right. mean, April is a really fantastic point because

13:24
What happens is you feel like it’s easy, right? And so you’re like, why is everybody making such a big deal about this? Right? So then instead of coming off as feeling… Oh yeah, sorry. I totally preempted your point. No, no. Let’s just go on with the conversation. I think that’s totally fine. So I mean, instead of like, you know, people feeling like, oh, this person is really like smart and admirable and inspirational. just like…

13:48
would it concede it? Like, gosh, I feel so much worse. I’m like, oh, yeah, well, it’s not easy for the rest of us. And so it’s totally an unintended consequence and totally unintended impact. But you do have a tendency to come off as looking aloof and condescending. And really tone deaf. And really tone deaf to think like, oh, why? I mean, yeah, it was fine. It was easy. Don’t do that. Don’t do that to yourself. And don’t do that to other people. And also,

14:16
Let me just say that there’s some watch outs to this. So one of the watch outs here is not to throw people under the bus to make yourself look good. Oh, absolutely. Right. So that is not a way to emphasize your accomplishments. You should never be throwing people under the bus in business for any reason. Correct. Correct. But a lot of people in an attempt to try to, and this is where I the arrogance comes, when they try to really

14:40
prop themselves up will be like, those people over there were just, they just didn’t do their work and I had to come in and I had to fix them all and I had to fix all the work. Exactly. That, you you want to avoid, that is where you kind of start bordering lying to arrogant. But then also on the other side of the coin, don’t sandbag it as well. So that’s another way that people might go too far over on the emphasizing the effort, which is like, oh yeah, I mean, it was like,

15:06
It’s gonna take me a hundred hours to get that done and you know it’s really gonna take you like 30 minutes. Or you’re like, oh, we expect like 10 likes on the social post when you know you’re probably gonna at get like 200. So don’t stand back in order to like minimize the expectations. That usually gets called out too. Well, and I think that that also makes you look tone deaf in a different way. if people are like, you seriously don’t think that I know what’s going on here? Like really, give me a little more credit. Exactly, exactly.

15:36
So it is, again, something to play with, right? But just keep in mind that even if it’s easy, you don’t need to overly explicitly convey that. And that’s not just in the words you say, it’s in your facial expressions, it’s in your behaviors, it’s in your tone, it’s in all those other things. So if you’re getting those reactions from people, take a look at all of that.

16:04
So the mindset shift here is to make sure to give yourself credit for being good at what you do by respecting the effort. said that in many different ways. And so that is the one that you need to take away for this point. Yeah. So I’ll just put the fine point here that there’s absolutely no arrogance in doing it this way. If you work hard and you get great results, you deserve the recognition. And again, this was something that was hard for me. And it was hard really recently, actually, because I found myself sort of in this uncomfortable place again when Ann and I started doing this podcast.

16:32
Right? Where people would compliment it. And I was still kind of settling into like, I’m gonna say it like this, but it’s the quote unquote fame of it, right? Or like the sensationalism of it. Because I couldn’t get used to the reaction where I’d be like, yeah. And we also do a podcast. You do a podcast? And it like suddenly elevated me to like this celebrity level or this like awestruck place. And I didn’t know what to do with it. And so I caught myself though, to the point of this episode, like don’t default to that bad behavior.

17:02
And so what I realized is that I needed to create a narrative for myself to the point of this episode to be able to respond in kind to that. And the thing that always works really well for me is to just tell the truth. When I find myself in a place where I literally don’t know what tone to take or what approach or how to respond and I keep running up against the same thing, I’m like, just tell the truth. So my narratives become.

17:24
It’s definitely a labor of love and it takes a lot of hard work, but I love it. And it gives me an outlet. I was missing when I left my last agency and the infrastructure of just having to as part of my job support and manage a team. And I just love the idea that we have a platform to share our collective knowledge and our unique expertise. And the point that I make to myself in my head all the time is if it was easy, everyone would do it. And the main reason that podcasts fail is that the commitment to the work isn’t there.

17:53
So again, I have to own my work and the subsequent impact I am having as a result of it, to the point of all of this, not oversimplifying, taking the compliment, the entire thing. It just really hit home at this point for me. Yeah, I think that’s right on because probably the Tennessee women like, oh.

18:10
It’s really just a small podcast, right? We’re only getting a few listeners right now and it’s still kind of growing. It’s still in its infancy and all of sudden. And early on, all that was true, right? And again, I know the facts. It takes a while to take hold. It’s not like we’re in this dire situation. It was like, nope, we’re doing exactly what we should be doing. We’re chugging along, all those things. I just had to catch myself in that moment. Right, right. Because there would have been no benefit in saying that. No. Right? Because yes, all that, like you said, could be true, but

18:40
then what’s the impression that the person takes away as a result of that? And so there’s just no reason. That doesn’t mean, again, you’re lying and you’re sandbagging and inflating, but you’re just making sure that the excitement for what you’re doing is conveyed so that also they will go talk about it. It’s like, oh, that’s great. And then they’re more inclined to go talk about it to other people too, right? Yep, totally.

19:04
All right, so the fourth point on how to self promote without sounding arrogant is to volunteer to lead training or give a presentation on something you excel at. April, I’ll let you take this one. Yeah, and I’ll start by saying that if the training doesn’t exist, develop it. Right, right. It can be something as simple as a lunch and learn. mean, I know corporate and agency, we talk about the different sides. This is something that both sides use and use effectively, right?

19:26
I mean, I used to use this all the time at the agency to help people get over this hump, quite frankly, right? Where they were trying to self identify and decide their authentic tone and how to stand up for themselves and take compliments and all of that. And so we would put together, help them put together lunch and learn so that they could get exposure, show their experience, all of those things. But through to the point of this, a more educational point of view and approach for, you know, side note, you provide lunch, people will come.

19:56
free lunch. Yeah, absolutely. Make sure it’s good food. Side note also, side note to my side note. Or if you’re virtual, one of the tactics can be ask the boss to come. And if people see the boss on the list, regardless of whether they actually make it that day, if it’s important enough for the boss to be there, then it must be important enough for them to be there. Just a couple of tips there.

20:18
And then when you’re giving the lunch and learn as part of the teaching process, provide useful tools and processes as takeaways that people can utilize, similar to what we do on the show, right? Okay, we’re gonna give you the principles and then we’re gonna show you how to put them into action. It’s the same thing here. And then also on top of it, take ownership for them. You don’t have to be so overt in saying, know, these are April’s rules for brand character or anything like that, right? But you can put your name and the date in the footer, which helps it travel.

20:47
This is a corporate tip that I learned from Ann and actually some of our other coaching clients of like, you know, making sure your name’s in there because if it’s gonna travel, you want your name on it, you know, put, make it a PDF, don’t make it editable, all these small tips, right? Get the credit where credit’s due. But this really is a very tactical way of executing point number one, which is all about service, right? So it makes you look like an expert in the eyes of your colleagues and the eyes of management and the eyes of ownership, all of those different things.

21:15
And then the other thing is case studies. So case studies are another great way of self-promoting because by default you get the credit because you’re giving the presentation, right? Your name will become associated with it in conversations. Did you see that case study that April or Anne presented on X, Y, and Z? There were some interesting things in there that we might be able to apply. We should go talk to that person, right? All of that kind of starts to take on a life of its own.

21:41
And some of the other tools just to kind of round this out are examples of things you can do are audits, landscape analysis, trend reporting, things that show thought leadership, proactivity, and again, your strategic sense of the business and what your role is in it and kind of getting that savviness from other people. So the mindset shift here is to be a teacher. Yeah, and I think this is a really great one to kind of flip it because if you’re worried about sounding arrogant when you can think about yourself as being a teacher, it takes on a whole

22:11
different connotation, it also allows you to really be more empathetic to the world around you. And so when you can get to that level, and again, this is not teacher in the standpoint of arrogance, because a lot of, we hear it on that side too, which is like, let me tell you a thing or two about how to do this, or let me tell you a thing or two about how this used to work or how this always worked or.

22:36
You know, we did this like, you know, 20 years ago and it didn’t work. So this is not the teacher we’re talking about. The kind of teacher we’re talking about is explaining, okay, just so you guys know like where I’m coming from and why I’m such an advocate for this or what your role, you know, person here did I, in the work that you’re doing, why I need it the way, when I need it and how I need it, like how that impacts what I’m trying to do. It’s all a matter of like really just driving a level of awareness.

23:04
And in that, you can actually then help teach an organization how to function. And you don’t have to be the manager or the leader to go do that. So I think this is a really important one, that if you can do that, knowledge just helps to really break down a ton of barriers. It drives awareness, like I said, it also drives a sense of appreciation. It drives a sense of more of collaborativeness and togetherness. So take advantage of this one. I think it’s a really good one. Yep, totally agree.

23:33
Alright, so just to recap, how to self promote without sounding arrogant. Contextualize your contribution and how you help and can help. So when you put your contributions in the context of how you helped, it feels and sounds more selfless. Second is flatter others as you promote yourself. When you lift others up, it doesn’t sound conceited to lift yourself up in the process and it elevates the impact of your work. Third is emphasize the effort behind the accomplishments. Be careful about being too humble. It undermines your contributions.

24:02
And finally, volunteer to lead training or give presentation around something you excel at. Trainers by default are generally held up as experts or the go-to people in the organization or business for that topic. All right, our next segment is in the trenches. And this is where we give real-world examples to industries with certain situations, but with broad applications. So anybody should be able to take these and put into action today. All right, so our first in the trenches question. I always struggle when it comes to performance review time, especially when trying

24:32
to define my specific contribution versus the teams. What do you suggest? The big one. This is the big one. We get this a lot. And we actually get it always too when we’re talking about resumes. Yep, we totally do. Right? So this is all about really fine tuning your highlight reel. And it is a highlight reel. And really being able to specifically talk about how your contribution has had a meaningful impact to the business.

24:58
All right, so again, people start getting really nervous here because if they’re humble or there’s some level of humility, because they don’t want to take quote unquote credit for what the team has done and make it seem like they’re the only one who did it or have it be perceived that they’re overstepping and all of those sorts of things, right? There is a way of being able to dimensionalize your contribution in the context of the team so that you can actually showcase both.

25:28
like we’ve been talking about. So here’s some specific ways that you can do that. So first is you can use that help structure to find point what your specific contribution is. So that’s what we talked about in point number one. So it would look something like I developed and executed the marketing strategy that enabled the brand to grow in household penetration by 5%. Right? Notice the I, right? they developed and executed, which is your role. All right.

25:54
That’s how you you contextualize what your action was and what you specifically contributed to that overall growth. But you’re not being arrogant and trying to say that you did it all by yourself. Right, and nobody takes it that way. Yes. Second is as a point exemplifies, always tie your contribution to a business KPI like you heard me just do. It’s fine if you also want to tie it to a more specific role-based KPI, but only if it’s evidently clear to everyone that it’s significantly built the business. So,

26:24
For example, I come from the world of communications where we talked a lot about impressions. Impressions mean nothing unless they have some impact on the business. Same with advertising recalls, same with social media engagement, same with video views. All these things are great role-specific KPIs, but you have to do the work to tie it back to the business. And that’s how you get the credit for the business growth, the business impact, which is what everybody’s generally looking for for career advancement, career progression.

26:52
Now it’s a creative claim contribution that you made happen even if you had support. Okay, so again, I go back to my comms work where I had an agency. My agency did a lot of the quote unquote work, but I led, managed and directed that work. So that work wouldn’t have happened without me. So I actually get that credit for that contribution. And that looks something like I led the team which exceeded its goals in delivering, fill in the blank, okay? I don’t need to actually say,

27:22
I led an agency to go do this work. mean, people know that I had an agency and the agency had a role to play in the work. I can just say that I led that team, which actually was able to deliver a goal that exceeded expectations. It’s like I said, those things are a highlight rail, right? But don’t undermine what your contribution is as well. Like, so a lot of people say they’re so far down in the weeds that what they’re doing, they don’t think it has that direct impact on

27:51
the actual business and I say this is where you are very, very wrong. So we had a guest on who gave us the story of, or alleged story, right, of John F. Kennedy when he went to NASA and he went and talked to one of the janitors there and he goes, oh, you know, what do you do here? And the janitor looked at him really strangely and said, well, president, Mr. President, I’m here to put a man on the moon, right? So I love that. I love that too, because it really is like symbolizing it and it helps, you know, to really

28:20
Tangibly put into your mindset that everybody has a role to play and it takes everybody in order to make the business go. So don’t think that what you’re doing is so small or insignificant that it doesn’t have an impact. I guarantee if you’re there, you’re going to get paycheck. has an impact, but also be careful about not like listing everything you do as like tasks that you’re completing. Really take that second step and really tie it.

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to something that you know has delivered significant impact for the business. Yeah, and I mean, I’ve always loved the idea of the highlight reel. And the thing that I will build on here is you have to be able to connect the dots and tell the story, right? This is what’s gonna show your strategic ability and your savvy and show that you can think bigger to Anne’s points than just this is the thing or the things that I do here, right? It shows what role you play in elevating the work, in solving the ask.

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And it really makes your case airtight and allows you to be thoughtful about what you want to communicate. And the way that I really specifically think about this through my storytelling lens is if you only want them to take away three things, what are those three things, right? And three is a bit of an arbitrary number, but you know, three, five, whatever it is in your head. But what that does is allows you to frame up that story.

29:46
in a way that you can choose what you’re going to communicate and what points you want to reinforce through your narrative. Yeah, I think that’s a really good point. And that’s kind of what we talk a lot about personal brand in your what you want to be known for, right? Yep. So make sure that also comes through when you’re doing your performance overviews. However, that shows up is thinking about what we.

30:13
qualify as, I want to be known as a person that, right? So fill in that blank. And those helps you to really refine these things in order to build that perception that you want to have with people. Yes, absolutely. All right, our second in detretches question. I just wasn’t raised to be boastful. How do I get over it, April? Well, to my point about us over indexing in the Midwest around being humble and nice, right? Or Midwest nice.

30:40
This one really speaks to it. So this is really where the appearance part of your personal brand comes into play. Right? Boseful is a perception and the way to get over it is to make sure your physical and verbal appearance does not give that perception. Ann talked about me being the tone police, right? It’s all about your tone, about your style, about your presence, and then what you choose to emphasize. So

31:03
For example, if someone is relaying a social post they just saw and really liked and something you worked on, can choose to say, yeah, that was all my idea. I did all of that. I feel like I’m channeling my little Mia right now in my tone. Which yeah, that comes across as boastful, okay? Or you can take a different approach and say,

31:24
Oh, thank you. I’m so excited you like it. I’ve been working really hard to try and capture our voice. I so appreciate the feedback. And also please let me know if you have any additional feedback. I feel like for Ann and me, I’m always reinforcing the point of we’re an open book. We’re super direct, right? Give us the feedback. And that is also another one of my, you know, coping mechanisms, if you will, on how to take compliments.

31:46
as an aside. But here you established it was your work and your idea without having to directly state that. And you made the other person feel useful in providing their feedback and continuing the conversation with you to provide more. And you also established bigger picture that you’re the person they should come to on social. And I think, know, we really the secondary thing here, we’re talking about social cues that you put out there in the way you communicate throughout this episode. Right. So I think another layer of this is by taking that approach,

32:15
and leaving that door open and being pleasant and amicable really, I guess, in the interaction, you become someone that other people want to come back to and react with or interact with more, right? Also, you have to get over that claiming credit for your accomplishment is boastful. If it’s justified, it’s not boastful. It’s just in how you then, again, take that credit that dictates how it’s going to be received. Yeah, I mean, I think you guys are hearing a very common theme through here that…

32:44
It’s all in the way that you say it and it’s what you say, right? So what you say and how you say it. And that really determines the way that people receive it. And April just kind of gave you an example of how the words could sound very boastful in doing it and then how you can phrase it a different way so it doesn’t sound boastful, but still be of service to others, right? So it’s a very…

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really fantastic way of being able to then have that communication with people. And if you can really practice it and really learn to master that, it’s going to be extremely useful in your career progression and in your career reputation overall. Yeah. And I’ll just say one more final thing on this one is if you’re self-aware, the chance of you coming across as boastful is slim. Yeah. So, mean, and this is something I used to coach people all the time, that if they just had self-awareness,

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with anything, right? Because when you’re younger, you have a fear that you’re going to make a mistake and oh my gosh, the impact that that might have, right? And so one of the things I would always say is you’re a highly, highly self-aware person. So the size of your mistakes and the impact of the business are going to be slim. There’ll be a blip on the radar. So don’t be so afraid of messing up. And I feel like it’s similar here. You know what it looks like if you’re self-aware when someone brax, right? When they’re just being boastful, you know what that looks like. So

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just avoid the language outlined above and the tips here and ultimately you’ll be good to go. Yeah, I totally agree with that. All right, our third endotrenches question is someone else is taking all the credit for my work. How do I prevent that? And this is really the consequence that you face when you decide not to self promote. Absolutely. Right? And so first of all, don’t underestimate people’s ambition. If it’s good work and nobody is claiming it, it’s

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really fair game and that’s the way people see it, right? Well, if so and so is doing that and they’re not gonna claim it, well then, yeah, why wouldn’t I? It’s open for the taking at that It’s open for the taking, you’re right. So the biggest way of preventing it is by regularly and consistently reporting on your efforts, right? And I know this has just made a bunch of you guys just cringe, right? Well, to the point of the episode, you’re like, oh, I have to sing my own praises. Oh yeah, right. And I’m gonna do it on a regular basis. Are you kidding me? That’s the advanced course, right?

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But you can do this in a very non-cringeworthy way, okay? So this can be through update emails, it can be through a newsletter, it can through be status meetings, it can be one-on-ones with your boss. But the point is to take the opportunities to share what you’re up to. So this helps establish yourself as well as establish yourself as the practitioner of the work. Don’t gloss over the updates, guys. Like a lot of times our egos will get in the way and when someone asks us, how’s it going? We’ll just say, well, it’s fine, right?

35:30
when really it isn’t, right? Or really we have something we really wanna share or something great that just happened. But again, we’re not, you know, I’m not gonna go into that, right? I’m like, either I don’t want to appear, again, boastful or too, I don’t want to look bad or I don’t want my boss to feel like I can’t handle it and all these other things. Just keep in mind, like, your ability to manage through critical challenges and conflicts is a really good way to demonstrate you are ready for advancement.

35:58
And so don’t pretend like everything is fine if it’s not. This will definitely come back to bite you because somewhere somehow it’s gonna all fall apart and then your boss is gonna go like, why didn’t you just tell me? Why didn’t you just let me know? So there’s nothing to me is more impressive than a person who can work through a challenge and come out, try and put on the other end. I find it totally inspiring. It’s one of the big things I always look to to see if somebody was ready for career advancement, a career progression. So don’t underestimate the power of being able to demonstrate that you’ve gone through challenges. Again.

36:27
don’t sandbag it again and say it was like the most difficult thing that you went through when it’s not, but definitely give the actual recount again to the point of emphasizing the work that it went into in order to demonstrate that. Now, if somebody is taking the credit and they’re blatantly and obviously doing it, you can always approach them, right? And I know this is really uncomfortable for a lot of people and just ask them like, Hey, you know, what’s going on here? And you try to be diplomatic and not defensive.

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and then try to take the ownership back for actually sharing out the results and the impact. And give that person a role in it if they actually deserve a role, right? So, but take control of that and take the control of that back and make sure that you are managing the reporting out of the work that you feel like you’re responsible for. Yeah, I mean, I’m always, you know, back to the point of putting your name on it or presenting it yourself. I’m always a fan of

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why don’t you let me present it since I’m so in the weeds and you can emphasize the bigger picture points, right? To the point if they deserve a role in it. It makes the other person then feel like they do have a role and then also it kind of pats them on the back that they may be more elevated quote unquote, but you still get to show off your stuff, right? But I think the other side of that to Anne’s point is if they don’t deserve the role, it can be super hard to confront this. I mean, but I think

37:53
The way that I always think about that is if you don’t confront it, it’s only going to get worse and it’s only going to get bigger. And so you’re going to have that pit in your stomach, which we all know what that feels like, right? Where you’re like, oh man, that person’s going to be around again this time. And what am I going to do to handle it? And all of those kinds of things. mean, that’s what we’re talking about here. And so I know it’s easy for me to say I’m direct. I don’t have a lot of problems with confrontation.

38:20
maybe the opposite, especially early in my career. However, I just want everyone to hear that point that you really do have to learn to stand up for yourself. And there will always be people that you don’t gel with that do things they shouldn’t. They’re, you know, maybe slightly underhanded or even if not, if you’re not going to take the credit and they’re going to, but no matter what you have to decide whether or not standing up for yourself is actually the harder thing because in my mind it’s more

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swallowing it down and continuing to do so. Yeah. And I think that, I think your points are well taken. And I think the thing is we have a tendency to go into victim mode here. Yeah. Don’t go into victim mode. mean, realize that you have a choice and you’re making the choice not to stand up for yourself and to really showcase your work and take ownership for the work. And really, mean, though, like you said, going and facing the person can be very daunting.

39:17
then you need to go on offense. So you need to do one thing or the other. if you’re going to let the, or if you don’t, then you kind of are subject to the repercussions and subject to the consequences. Somebody else is going to take the credit for the work. Right. And sometimes I’m like, there is more to that. Like, I know we’re talking about this in the vacuum and there’s circumstances and it could be somebody that’s way above you and that’s really hard to, you know, to, to do that. But you can still take these things and put them into practice.

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in a way that shows showcases that you are the person who is the expert here. Right. All right. And our third and final segment is marketing smarts moments. This is someone we have seen recently either using or not using their marketing smarts that we wanted to bring to your attention. They kind of bring a little bit of relevancy to the marketing context may or may not have anything to do with this episode. And so this one doesn’t really have a lot to do with you just want to brag about you’ve been traveling all

40:15
Well, maybe. Well, I’m going to brag about, yeah, so I’m going to self promote myself that I’m platinum medallion. Yay. And really all that means is I’m really good at using my credit card. so I know how to like take the miles and transform into MQMs and like, yeah, I know how to do that. So, so yeah. But if you need help, if anyone wants some help in how to do that, you know, you can reach out to me. You’re become like the points guy. Yeah. We’ll see what it’s going to be. I know what you’re doing. Okay.

40:45
trying to kind bring it back. Very tongue in cheek. Yeah. Touche. Yeah. yeah. Okay. So yeah. So I wanted to highlight Delta and this was actually on a recent trip. And I know we kind of, sometimes we get the airlines a really hard time, but, um, this was something I was actually really impressed by. And for all the traveling I’ve done, I’ve never seen happen before. And we were on a, a long urge flight from Scottsdale back to Cincinnati. So it’s like a three and a half hour flight. And, uh, we were kind of getting to the, like after the two hours.

41:15
into it. So people were kind of finishing their movies. The grind. Yeah. And, um, there was like, was the second trip of the drink cart already gone through and stuff like that. And so here’s a point in time where usually the flight attendants are like, Oh, I’m just going to sit down and, know, check at the end of the flight, right. Until I have to come back and get everybody’s trash. But instead the flight attendants in this flight were doing some different things. Like one was actually carrying somebody’s baby up and down the aisle. I I presumably to give the

41:44
whoever the parents were, a break. Just walking the baby up and down the aisle. I was like, that’s kind of cute. Then another one was going through and she had a little handheld and she had everybody who had frequent flyer status on her little handheld and who was a frequent flyer member. She was going up and down each aisle and thanking everybody for being a frequent flyer. That’s crazy. I’ve never seen that before. I’ve never seen that happen either. I actually have seen the flight attendant holding the baby, which is super cute. It is super cute. The was losing its mind and so were the parents. I get that, but yeah.

42:14
I’ve never seen the other one. Yeah. so the funny thing was, that Ainsley, my 18 year old had just gotten her frequent flyer. Ah, yeah. Yeah. So she had just gotten it. was part of becoming an adult, right? So she got a thank you. It’s like, oh, Miss Westbrook, thank you so much for joining Delta Frequent Flyer Program. I hope to see you more flights. she thanked me for being medallion status. Like, is there anything we can get you before we leave? drinks? Yeah, exactly.

42:41
I just thought that was a really great way of, again, being of service in a way to form those emotional connections that I thought was going above and beyond. Like I said, most of the time at that point, the flight attendants would just be sitting. I thought that that was a really…

43:02
Very, very human, very human and very high touch. And it’s a very of again, of service. And we talk a lot about being of service in this episode. So it’s kind of being of service in a slightly different way. And I was coming off the heels of a call I had just made to Delta, about making week and a half ago, two weeks ago, when I was trying to re use Corinne’s e-credits and I couldn’t get it done on my app. And when I called the guy and he’s like, oh yeah, we should be able to make that work for you. I was like, yeah, I couldn’t do it on my.

43:30
on my phone and he’s like, or my app and he goes, well, that’s just job security for me. And I get to talk to you now. I was like, wow, that’s like a different tone. So I mean, it just, it just goes to, again, you know, come up with the, the, big points that we talked about today, which is how much tone matters. Um, and especially when you’re engaging with people and just kind of taking that little extra effort to make those human connections, then they stick with people and be like, you know what, after that experience, I’m like, I’m more inclined just to kind of fly Delta. Um, because I feel like I’m.

44:00
being taken care of more than I would on other airlines. So even if I have to spend a little bit more, I might be willing to do that because the experience is better. Well, and I think there’s a certain level of levity in that experience, right? Because you’re right. we, I mean, I can’t even tell you how many times in my career that I would use the airlines as the doom and gloom experience. You don’t want to be like those guys, you know, that sort of thing. But

44:24
And so I think we all have that perception in our head, but I love this example because I think it adds, well, levity in the world we’re in right now, and I won’t go any further than that, but also in a space where just the slightest bit of grace can have such a huge impact because the reputation hasn’t historically been there. Right. So I mean, they’re stepping it up a little bit. It’s great, especially since right now the ticket prices are very high. Very high,

44:53
I just thought whoever decided that they’re going to take it up a notch, it was a very, very fine move. Yeah, very tasteful. So just to recap, how to self promote without sounding arrogant. Contextualize your contribution on how you help and can help. When you put your contributions in the context of how you helped, feels and sounds more selfless and less arrogant. Next, flatter others as you promote yourself. When you lift others up, it doesn’t sound conceited. Lift yourself up in the process and it elevates the impact of your work.

45:23
Third, emphasize the effort behind the accomplishments. Be careful about being too humble. It can undermine your contributions. And finally, volunteer to lead training or give a presentation about something you excel at. Trainers by default are generally held up as experts or the go-to people in the organization or business for that topic. Did we spark something with this episode that you want to talk about further? Reach out to us through our website, ForthRight-People.com. We can help you customize what you have heard to move your business.

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and make sure to follow or subscribe to Strategic Counsel on your favorite podcast platform.